Merry Christmas to all you kiddos out there. I had a lovely Christmas, between a wedding party in Alibaug and a turkey BBQ at a friend’s parents house. When the 24th fun and adventure was over, 25th kicked in with all that a family night brings–mashed potatoes, Amaryllis, wine, mac n’ cheese and boardgames. Many thanks to the inside-out beautiful Yusuf’s for having us.
I also wanted to say, an extra merry merry to all of you who dislike Christmas and other holiday seasons because of your past, current financial situation, an illness or a health rut, a recent breakup or just generally because it sometimes sucks to try and be happy when you’re not but everyone else is or you’re supposed to be. An extra merry hug to you.
I’m honestly not much of a holiday junkie–I despise the idea of Christmas gifts (what. a. waste) and don’t like the pressure of seeing people for seeings sake. But Christmas is my favourite time of the year. As a kid, growing up, I used to have a full Christmas stocking, a tree full of gifts, an Advent calendar full of chocolate. To this day, I love the build up of an entire month counting down to the big day, with Advent candles, Christmas carols on the radio, shining stars in windows, winter flower garlands on the front doors, and hints of saffron or gingerbread or scented candles in every home and every shop. Feeling up wrapped-up gifts under the tree, having mom’s hot chocolate at home after school, and dressing up to the teeth for every other occasion.
I’m also a child of divorced parents, and all too well know the gut-wrenching feeling of choosing who to spend Christmas with, or waking up with a sinking feeling in your stomach instead of a swarm of butterflies. I know the feeling of watching someone you love fade away in the midst of the season to be jolly, and the feeling of wishing you could gift someone you love the entire world, but only being able to afford to take them out to pizza (or worse: nothing at all).
So, just to be clear, in the midst of all the bloggers holiday outfits, family gatherings, delicious dinners and expensive unwrapped Christmas gifts; we’re happy, and there are also parts of us that are not. And that’s ok. We all feel happy as hell but also very much like shit sometimes–especially around the holidays.
And hey, lucky for you fellow doubters out there, both Christmas and New Years fall on weekends this year. You basically have zero time off to dwell on things… So much festive anxiety, so little time. Sigh.
Happy holidays, guys. Take care of each other, but most importantly, yourselves.